


Make Mine a Reality

by deathscience



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Canon Asexual Character, M/M, Masturbation, Spoilers up to 160, Trans Jonathan Sims, Trans Male Characters, Trans Martin Blackwood, Vaginal Fisting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:09:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23305819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathscience/pseuds/deathscience
Summary: Jon didn't notice Martin's hands at first, but now they are all he can think about.(AKA Jon has a hand kink that he suffers through before he can finally have something done about it)
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims
Comments: 15
Kudos: 270





	Make Mine a Reality

**Author's Note:**

> I am so tired. This took so much longer than I thought it would. I just wanted to write fisting kink, but then I spent like 2k words working up to it because it didn't Feel right without explaining.  
> Inspired by [this post](https://elias-fucker.tumblr.com/post/612986584409702400/martin-having-big-hands-and-jon-constantly) because Saturn has good ideas and good anons.

Martin has big hands.

It’s not something Jon noticed immediately, or even during all the time they worked near each other in research. It wasn’t until they moved to the archives that he had the opportunity to realize it.

They’re discussing one of the cases Martin was working on. Jon was pointing at one part of the document, arguing about some inconsistency, when Martin reached over and pointed at another section, defending what he wrote. Jon looked over, but his mind stuck on the sight of Martin’s hand. Though Jon is pretty average in height and weight, he knows his hands are small compared to others. Sasha and Tim found it cute when they realized that their hands were longer than his own, back in research. Jon had huffed at that, saying it wasn’t that big of a difference.

This was not the same at all. Martin’s hand completely dwarfed Jon’s, the difference obvious now that they were beside each other. His palm was wide, and his fingers were long and thick. His nails were short, jagged, and had chipped purple nail polish. Jon was overcome with the desire to hold Martin’s hand, to see if they were soft like they seemed or if they were rough, or some combination of the two. He didn’t realize he hadn’t responded until Martin cleared his throat and quickly pulled his hand away. There was a moment of awkward silence before Jon remembered what they were doing and returned to the case.

So that was when Jon noticed Martin’s hands. He decided to put the odd ideas about those hands out of his mind and focus on work.

That plan worked right up until Jon got home. The embarrassment that followed Jon after his meeting with Martin added to the general stress that went with organizing the archive and trying to record statements that insisted on being awful to his computer. He needed to destress.

That was why he was spread out on his bed in only his undershirt, fucking his cunt with four fingers while his free hand stroked his cock quickly. His mind was buzzing but blank and focused on nothing beyond the fingers in and on him. His orgasm came in moments later, his whole body tensing and ripping a whine out of him. Jon kept his fingers inside himself as he relaxed again, debating on fingering himself for another orgasm or using his toys. Stretching himself open further was a pleasing thought but moving to get one of his dildos was not as much. He wished his fingers were longer and thicker, like Martin’s. Imagining a hand like that pushing inside him, forcing him wide open, made Jon’s body shiver in arousal.

Then the thought fully processed, and Jon froze. That was… That was not normal for Jon. He never imagined other people when he masturbated, not even if he forced himself to. Was this sexual attraction? He had no idea how to tell. After a moment, Jon slowly started moving his hands again.

He tried imagining Martin fucking him, but the idea slipped from his mind as easily as any other time he tried to imagine other people with him. Then Jon tried imagining Martin sitting between Jon’s legs, his sleeve rolled up as he rubbed Jon’s cock with his thumb, his other fingers all pressed inside Jon and spread wide. That image did not slip away from him, instead making Jon gasp and orgasm suddenly and violently against his own fingers.

As Jon laid in bed, overheated and panting, he realized he might have a thing for Martin’s hands, or at least big hands. It wasn’t a big deal. Martin would never know, and Jon was sure this wouldn’t change anything.

Jon realized that he did not have much self-control when it came to his own thoughts. At least, not when they came to Martin’s hands.

On a regular workday, Jon saw Martin regularly. Martin would come bring him files or tea, would sometimes stop by around lunchtime to try and convince Jon to eat out with the rest of them. That was normal. What was different was Jon’s awareness of him. Before, Jon’s attention would be on whatever file he had or on his laptop. Now, he found himself looking up and seeing how Martin’s hands wrapped almost entirely around the mugs he brought for Jon, or how much of the file he held was covered by his fingers. When Martin stood at the doorway asking about lunch, one hand held the frame while the other completely covered the doorknob.

All of this would have been fine if Jon wasn’t completely distracted by those hands. Martin had to repeat himself nearly every time he came in, Jon forgetting to respond when focused on the girth of Martin’s hands, how it would feel to have those fingers inside him. It was the most Jon had ever thought about sex, and it was extremely frustrating. He had no idea how to get the thoughts out of his head besides avoiding Martin, which was impossible when all their interactions were Martin seeking him out in the first place. He kept their conversations short and avoided looking at Martin as much as possible.

If he imagined Martin’s hands on and in him every night as he got himself off, then that was no one’s business but Jon’s.

After the Prentiss attack, Jon found that pretending he wasn’t fantasizing about his coworker’s hands constantly became easier. When he saw Martin, he could focus on his suspicion.

After being framed for murder, it’s even easier since he couldn’t see Martin at all.

When Jon returned to the institute, he spent little time in the building itself and even less time with his coworkers. In those times, seeing Martin was more focused on the relief of seeing a friendly face than anything else.

At some point by then, Jon realized that he actually liked Martin, rendering his previous method of avoiding him difficult and painful. He knew about the other’s feelings, but it didn’t feel like the right time to discuss it, with the Unknowing on the horizon. There would be time after, Jon knew. He would work out his feelings and then he could talk to Martin. The world wouldn’t be endings and for once, maybe, he could relax.

Naturally, Jon’s luck was absolute shit. He died, came back half a year later, and everything was different. Martin was at the institute but not really, not close enough. Jon was so alone.

The stress was endless and being at the institute all the time made it difficult to have a moment alone. When he found the chance, he would clear off his desk and lay on it, feet on his chair. Then he would work himself open fast and hard, his eyes closed as he imagined Martin’s much bigger fingers inside him. The afterglow of orgasm would always fade quickly when Jon remembered that Martin wanted Jon as far away as possible.

Despite Jon telling himself that he would never utter a word about his fascination with Martin’s hands, it ended up happening.

After the Lonely, leaving London, in Scotland, they talked a lot. Small talk, playing catch up, about their feelings, anything that they could share. Jon told Martin about his grandmother, his parents, Mr. Spider. He told Martin about better times, at university with Georgie, his embarrassing first meeting with Tim, the quiet comfort he and Daisy brought one another. Martin told Jon about his mother, the nights spent in fear of not being able to afford all their bills, the days after Jon’s death. He told Jon about when he started writing poetry, his own first meetings with Tim and Sasha, about when he first saw Jon and later when he started to like him. Jon told Martin about how he realized he liked Martin.

There was a comfortable silence as they looked at each other, smiling and taking in the features of one another. Then a prickle of anxiety ran through Jon and he spoke up again.

“I don’t know if you know this,” he began. “And I don’t… I don’t think it will change anything, but I think it’s important to tell you. That I’m uh, transgender.”

Martin’s smile, which had faded for a moment in worry, returned. “Oh, same,” he replied. “I uh, I’m a trans guy. Actually, I should take off my binder. It’s been well over eight hours, I’d say.”

“Yes, it has,” Jon replied, trying to control the relieved smile on his face and failing. “You should take care of that now.”

“It’s getting pretty late,” Martin noted as he got up. “I say we should both head to bed.”

Jon nodded and the two of them took turns with the shower. Once in bed, they took a moment to look at one another again. Then, Martin took Jon’s hand in his own and Jon froze.

“Everything alright?” Martin said, his hand attempting to leave but Jon squeezed it tight.

“Yes, I…” Jon’s voice was soft, and he cleared his throat before continuing. “It’s just, I-I-I really like your hands?”

“Oh!” Martin replied, looking surprised but pleased. “That’s, hm. That’s funny, actually. I used to think you uh, didn’t like them, so I’m glad.”

The idea that Jon had ever actively disliked Martin’s hands was mindboggling. “Why would I dislike them?”

“Erm, it’s just that for a while you would stare at my hands? Like, a lot? And I thought it was because I bite my nails or, or the nail polish or something?”

“No, no, I never thought that,” Jon quickly reassured Martin. He hadn’t realized his staring had been so obvious. “It’s actually, hah, it’s the opposite. I was staring because I liked your hands a lot. Er, more than was appropriate.”

Jon chewed on his lip as Martin rubbed his thumb over Jon’s wrist. They were being open, so saying more wouldn’t be out of line, right? “What I mean to say,” he forced himself to continue. “Is that I had, ah, fantasies, about your hands.”

That made Martin’s motions pause as he parsed Jon’s statement. “By fantasies,” he asked slowly. “What do you mean, exactly?”

“You have to understand,” Jon said quickly. “I’m not, uh, I don’t usually… Ugh, this is difficult for me. I don’t really, do sex? Or rather, it doesn’t typically occur to me to think about having sex with other people. But when I look at your hands or, or feel them, I just um, start imagining how it would feel if, if you used them. On me. As in, you fingering me, and, and seeing how much I could take inside me.”

How did people talk about these things normally? Just saying this much made Jon’s face burn and made it impossible to look directly at Martin, instead his gaze focused just beyond it. He felt Martin starting to rub his wrist again, which was both a comfort and a distraction.

“That’s actually not the first time someone has asked me something like that,” Martin said, making Jon at him again. Martin’s face was a flushed as Jon’s felt. “I guess I have pretty big hands and it’s a thing people like? So, I’ve done some stuff like that, and I wouldn’t mind doing it to you, if you wanted it beyond hypotheticals.”

Jon’s head was dizzy with the thought of his fantasies being a reality. He hadn’t actually prepared himself for that. “I – I would like that. But, um, not tonight?”

“Oh, no, definitely not tonight,” Martin replied. “We’ll need some stuff first. We can pick it up when we go shopping, and then whenever you want to, we can do it.”

“Okay,” Jon sighed out, a small smile on his lips. “Okay, yeah. That sounds… That sounds good.”

True to his word, when they finally went shopping Martin made sure to grab what they would need for Jon’s fantasy. They decided to go to the bigger town farther than the village near their home to get various things for the safehouse, which turns out to be a blessing as they are both somewhat embarrassed buying a large amount of lube at one of the shops. Martin also got nail clippers and a nail file, then got distracted by nail polish. After some insistence from Jon, they get a color for each of them as well as a top and base coat.

Before going grocery shopping, they stopped by a small restaurant for lunch. It felt almost like a date, before Jon realized that it could be a date. He declared it as much to Martin, who laughed with a blushing face and happily agreed.

Once the shopping was all done, they returned home and put everything away. Jon was buzzing with nerves the closer they got to the house, and now in it he was unable to stop moving. Tapping his feet, patting his thighs, running fingers through his hair. It was surreal to think that he would be doing this soon.

As he started gently tugging on his hair, he felt Martin’s hand on his own. “Are you alright?” Martin asked, his face pinched with worry. “If you’re nervous, we don’t have to do it. You know that right? You can always change your mind; it’ll be fine.”

“No, no, I want to,” Jon said, turning his hand to hold Martin’s. “I’m just – hm. I’m nervous, but not in a bad way. I don’t have much experience. Well, with other people. I er, I have experience with penetration though. You’re just. Big.”

Martin giggled at that, which was a ridiculously endearing sound for Jon. He couldn’t help smiling back. “It’s fine, Jon,” Martin said, his free hand cupping Jon’s cheek. “Just let me know if you feel uncomfortable or want to stop, alright?”

Jon nodded though his eyes had closed. Martin’s palm was warm and it spread over so much of his face. He was being kissed a moment later, adding to the pleasant warmth as Martin’s lips pressed softly against his.

“Do you want to try it now or later?” Martin asked when he pulled back.

“Now,” Jon replied immediately.

“Alright, let me do a few things first. I’ll meet you in the room.”

Jon nodded, heading to the bedroom and waiting. He focused on the noises Martin made as he walked around. The floor creaked with his steps, then there was the rustle of a plastic bag. A door opened and a switch was flipped, then the rustling of the bag again. Jon closed his eyes and focused on the feeling of the noises.

He was nearly dozing when Martin came back. He looked up when the bed shifted beside him, Martin depositing the lube bottles to the side.

“Hi,” Jon said as he took Martin’s arm and pulled at him. Martin moved closer until he was straddling Jon’s lap. While Jon wasn’t short, reaching just a bit under six feet, Martin was taller by at least five inches. Their current position made that difference even larger, not that Jon particularly minded. But Martin hummed and frowned, then maneuvered them into switched positions. Jon found he didn’t mind this position at all either when Martin’s hands settled on his hips. He took in a sharp breath, then surged forward into a kiss.

They were content with that much for a while, as they had been for the past few days. Kissing was nice. Jon loved the feeling of Martin’s hair as he tangled his hands in it, the warmth that was shared from being pressed so close, and the noises Martin made when Jon bit at his lips.

It was different now, though. Where before Martin had been hesitant with touching, usually keeping his hands static, now he used them to explore as much of Jon as he could. As Martin spread his hands open over Jon’s sides, Jon couldn’t help the soft moan he let out as he realized how much of his body Martin covered. Then there were hands under his shirt and over his back, soft and wide and forcibly ejecting any thoughts Jon had beyond warm and hands and Martin. Any tension in Jon left and he melted against Martin, sighing in content. Martin took that opportunity to press his tongue into Jon’s mouth. Jon responded languidly, letting Martin take the lead.

Each point of contact and motion left Jon’s body with a buzzing warmth, and when he focused on the feeling, he realized how wet he was. His state wasn’t helped when one of Martin’s hands went to his front and ran over his stomach.

“ _Martin,_ ” Jon groaned, jerking back from their kiss. Martin looked like a smug mess, his hair sticking up oddly and his bright cheeks burning over a smirk.

“Yes, Jon?”

“I want, can, can we…” Jon struggled to get the words out, but Martin thankfully took charge.

“Take your shirt off for me?”

With a jerky nod, Jon tried to undress quickly but ended up stuck. Martin helped him out off it, looking at Jon with a hopelessly endeared smile. It would have been difficult to hold back his own smile, so he didn’t try. He cupped Martin’s face in his hands, his thumbs tracing over his cheekbones and soft skin. It was so easy to get lost in just touching and looking at Martin after spending so long being unable to. He had all of Martin now, all that Martin wanted to give.

Martin’s hands were on his bottoms, undoing the buttons and helping Jon out of them. It was easier than the shirt and after tossing everything aside Jon returned to his position on Martin’s lap. He felt exposed, but the feeling wasn’t unpleasant when it was with Martin. It was made better as Martin looked him over and let his hands wander down Jon’s hips and thighs. Jon bit his lip and opened his legs further as Martin’s thumbs ran over his inner thighs.

“Anything off limits?” Martin asked.

Jon’s mind needed a moment to catch up with him, as he was very focused on how Martin had moved his hand up to pet the hair trailing from his navel to his crotch. “No, just, I er, usually use the front?”

Martin hummed in response, continuing his exploration. Jon felt dizzy with arousal each time Martin got closer to his crotch, until finally he felt fingers rubbed into his cunt, both of their breaths hitching. Even with just this, Jon’s head was racing with thoughts of how Martin’s fingers felt compared to his own.

“Wow,” Martin said softly as he got his fingers slick. “Look at you. You’re really eager to get something inside you.”

Jon groaned and covered his burning face with the back of his hand. The sound got choked in his throat as Martin pressed a finger inside him. Jon made himself relax and put his hands on Martin’s shoulders. Martin went slowly but it didn’t bother Jon, since it allowed him to enjoy how much one of Martin’s fingers stretched him compared to his own. It kept going deeper and deeper, definitely much farther than Jon could reach.

“Is this alright?” Martin asked as he crooked his finger and searched Jon’s insides. “Tell me how it feels.”

“Good, it’s – a-ah,” Jon cut himself off with a soft cry when Martin pushed just right, buzzing warmth fogging his head with arousal.

“Good?” Martin prompted, expression unknown as Jon buried his face into the other’s shoulder. “I’d like a little more to work with, if that’s alright. I mean, unless you don’t want more inside of you.”

It was both a tease and a question of comfort. Jon shook his head, nuzzling into Martin’s neck. “You’re, you’re bigger than me, even just one,” Jon managed to whine out. “Please, please, put more, I want more.”

He could feel the shaky breath Martin let out, but he couldn’t focus on it as another finger was pushed inside him. Martin thrusted them deep and slow inside Jon while his thumb rubbed over Jon’s cock at the same pace. It was good, better than Jon imagined, Martin’s fingers pressing into him then scissoring him open then pressing again and the stretch was wonderful. He clung tightly to Martin’s shirt with heavy, heated breath beating against the other’s collar.

The pace was so, so slow, and he loved it. Jon could feel himself getting closer to his peak in small increments. His body responded in gradients that turned his voice from quiet pants to open moans, made his legs shake and hips jerk more insistently against Martin’s hand.

All the while, Martin was murmuring in Jon’s ear, telling him how good he was, how good he felt on top of Martin.

“I could spend all night spreading you open,” Martin said with a happy sigh. “You’d love that, yeah? You just want me to stretch you out until you can’t take anymore, just want me to fuck you open with my whole hand.”

Jon couldn’t hold back the crash of orgasm over him, choking on his moans, trembling and clenching down on Martin’s fingers. Martin kept stroking his cock until Jon relaxed against him, then he withdrew his hand. The absence made Jon grumble unhappily, which in turn made Martin chuckle.

“Do you want to keep going?”

“Yes,” Jon replied with a rough voice, a shiver running through him. He shifted on his knees to get more comfortable, then frowned. “Hm. Can I lay down though?”

“’Course” Martin said, taking hold of Jon and flipping him over carefully. Martin kissed his cheek before grabbing a bottle of lube and settling himself between Jon’s legs. This position made Jon feel more exposed, his thighs opened wide and giving Martin a proper view of him. Jon found he didn’t mind, though his face flushed further when Martin spoke.

“You’re a lovely sight, you know?” Martin’s hands were on his thighs, rubbing over them. “I can’t believe I get to see you like this, to make you good. I do make you feel good, right?”

The question had the shape of concern, but Martin’s eyes shone with delight. He wanted to check in with Jon, but he also wanted to make Jon say it. Jon liked to see the satisfaction on Martin’s face, so he swallowed his embarrassment. “You do,” he said softly, his hand covering one of Martin’s and moving it to his crotch. “I want you inside me, please.”

“Of course,” Martin’s face burned brightly at Jon’s words, but he looked delighted. He took his hand back to squirt a generous amount of lube on it, taking time to spread it over his fingers.

“You have to let me know if it gets too much,” Martin said, serious this time. Jon nodded quickly, impatient. Martin huffed, then pressed two fingers inside. It felt good to be filled again but Jon knew he could handle more. Martin seemed to notice as well, since he didn’t wait long to add another finger. 

It’s a lot. Three of Martin’s fingers stretched him more than four of Jon’s own, and they keep pressing up into nerves that made him groan and clutch the blankets underneath them. Martin was so careful, but it didn’t make the sensation less overwhelming or exhilarating. Jon felt as if he was floating, lost in the pleasant stretch and pressure inside him, and in the warmth of contact between their bodies. He didn’t know how much time passed before a fourth finger was added, but it was only a momentary discomfort that shifted into more of that pleasured pressure.

Jon only realized that he had been making soft whines and moans when Martin called out to him and made Jon focus on the sounds.

“Jon?” Martin said softly, his free hand stroking Jon’s cheek. Jon hummed in response as he nuzzled into the touch. “I’m going to put the rest in, alright?”

Jon nodded eagerly, his eyes closing as he kissed Martin’s palm. Martin laughed softly, then moved his hand to the back of Jon’s head and shifting him a bit.

“I want you to watch,” he said as he took his hand back. “Can you do that for me?”

Jon hummed and opened his eyes, looking down at where Martin penetrated him. He took a sharp breath seeing how his cunt stretched with Martin’s hand deep inside him. A sharp wave of arousal ran through him and made Jon whine as he tried in vain to press his legs closed. His cock ached with need, but at the same time he wanted to last longer if only to see Martin fully open him up.

Further thoughts ran away from Jon as he watched Martin add more lube to the hand inside him. Then, slowly, Martin pulled his hand out before pushing it back in with his thumb added. Jon watched and felt Martin’s hand go deeper inside him, going past the knuckle of Martin’s thumb and stretching him even wider than before. It was so much, and Jon couldn’t hold back the pleased cries as Martin pushed in more and more. When as much as Martin could fit was inside, Jon could feel the careful movement of those thick fingers inside him, shifting and curling to form a fist in him.

“God, Jon, you’re amazing,” Martin sighed out in breathless wonder. He thrusted his hand in shallow movements, prying choked moans from Jon. “Look at you, taking all of it in you. You’re so good to me, such a good boy.”

Jon sobbed at that, his body shaking from how warm and pleasant and full he felt. It was even more intense when Martin finally touched his cock, rubbing his palm over it in firm, circular motions. It didn’t take long for Jon to orgasm, overstimulated as he was from Martin’s almost painfully slow stretch of him. Jon tightened on the fist inside him and it was nearing too painful, but that just made it feel better for him.

Once he finished, Jon relaxed back on the bed, barely minding Martin’s movements until he pulled out of him gradually. Jon made an unhappy noise when he was emptied, then was momentarily silenced by a gentle kiss to his lips. He drifted back into a pleased haze, feeling and hearing movement around him without really taking any of it in. There was something wet and warm between his legs and Jon opened his eyes to see Martin wiping him clean with a wet hand towel.

“Hey,” Martin said, smiling up at Jon. His clothes were different, dressed now in sweatpants and a t-shirt. Jon realized he was out longer than he thought. “How are you feeling?”

Jon took a moment to take note of his body. “Tired,” he settled on. “A bit sore. But it feels nice. That was… that was very nice.”

“I’m glad,” Martin said, his smile widening. He moved away from Jon to put the towel in the hamper, then settled beside him in the bed. “Do you want help getting dressed?”

“Mm, I think I’d like to stay like this, if that’s alright,” Jon replied, putting his hand on Martin’s cheek. Then a thought suddenly occurred to him. “Er, what about you? I mean, do you need, um, reciprocation?”

He could feel Martin’s face heat up under his hand. “Oh, no, no, I uh, I took care of myself in the bathroom. You were pretty out of it, and I didn’t know how comfortable you were with me doing that next to you, so…”

Jon frowned, wondering how much he would be comfortable with regarding Martin. “I’ll admit, I haven’t really explored my boundaries much,” he said. “But, next time, I think I would like to at least watch you.”

It was interesting just how hot Martin’s face could get, Jon thought as he felt the skin under his hand burn further. “Okay!” Martin replied in a rush. “That. That sounds good. Next time.”

“Next time,” Jon agreed. He definitely wanted a next time.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a nsfw Tumblr so I can be thirsty, hit me up with prompts or to chat [@fetidphantasy](https://https://fetidphantasy.tumblr.com/)


End file.
